New Layout

Like the new layout?

Anyway, one last paper to go before holiday starts.
Last paper will be Foundation Physics.
Previous paper was Digital Electronics on Tuesday and Data Structures and Algorithm on Thursday.
Digital Electronics was a goner.
Not enough time so I only finish approximately half of it.
Data Structures and Algorithm was better thoough.
Kind of like the best I did in this Exam.
What is over is over already.
Now must focus on my last paper.

Onalee messaged me just now.
Ask me to go to work tomorrow.
Told her cannot because I need to study for the last paper.
Every second is precious. That what I have learnt this semester in university.
Well, I will be going back to work starting Tuesday after my last paper on Monday.
So hardworking! Ha.
Dou say lucky I'm going back to work.
Because Rasul quit already. His last day was wednesday I think.
Oh well. I wish Lao ban is still in T2.
I can't imagine working with Daniel.
I guess I have to face him sooner or later.

I want to go shopping after exams!
Seriously need some new jeans.
Dou! You must pei me ok?

I miss my dear.
Anyway, his POP will be on the 9th of December!
Hope his break will be 2 weeks instead of 5 days like ttw said.
Don't know whether I'll be going to his POP or not.
Might not be able to get away from BK anyway.

Anyway. Hope you guys like the new layout.
Tell me what to improve.
This might be a temporary one. :)
Ciaoz.

Hmm.

Yes, I will jiayou.
Thanks everyone, heart all of you :)

The only thing I can do right now is to jiayou.

Studying had always been an enjoyable experience till now.
The days we used to spend late nights studying for mid years, final years, prelims, O levels, Mid semester tests, Semester exams.
Not to mention the entire days that we used sitting in front of the computers doing F&N projects, Programming projects, FYP, and stuff.
It isn't the same anymore.

Seriously, I miss those days.
It was never like this, where you get sit down, getting so pissed off just by thinking, why can't I complete such a simple question without referring to the notes or people's answer?
Its so damn frustrating sometimes. The feeling of helplessness is so demoralising.
Especially when you feel like a nervous wreck before entering the examination hall.
When you sit down, its even worst.
You contemplate the paper and find out, yeah I forgot everything I've learnt.
Its often the case now.
I sit down and wonder, what the hell should I write on this paper when apparently, I don't know how to attempt the questions.
Well well. So in the end, all my answers are crap. Might as well hand in a blank script.

I'll just go in, sit down, write some crap, and wonder how the hell the rest of the people in the hall does it.
I feel stupid. Yes, it does have that impact on you.

Oh well.
Nothing I can control about it.
Time waits for no man. I am busy catching up with it.
There isn't enough time to study now, and I can only try my best.

Yes, I will jiayou.

[ Let's just hope for the best.. ]

it isn't as easy as it seems

Yes.
I'm back blogging.
Happy? lols
Well..
Many things happened in this half a year since I've stopped blogging.

Oh well.
Basically, I'm now struggling with my studies.
Sometimes, really feel like giving up.
But when I think about it, what can I do if I give up?
Go into a private university? Hmm.
Cost is definitely a problem, and besides, my dream was to get into NTU and get a degree right?

EEE was not my first choice. I know that I have absolutely no interest, not to say talent, in this field.
Bioengineering was not my aim either.
But since I can't get into a pure science field I got to grab the closest alternative right?
Yeah. I really hoped to get into Bioengine and I didn't.
I thought, why not try EEE out? Besides, in the final year, I still have a choice of choosing Medical field as my elective.
Yes. And now I can't even get past the first semester.
Oh wow.

Well, it seems like I'm not the only one having problems.
Seems like my friends around me have problems coping with the pace of university life.
One of them even dropped out.
That had sort of a big impact on me.
I feel like giving up too.
I keep thinking I can always get into a private uni, or work while appealing.
Seems like I'm running away from the problem. Ha.
It never occured to me university life will be this tough.
But I do want to get a degree.
I don't know what to do right now.
I know I won't do well this semester and I'm uncertain about the future semesters as well.
So, how? Damn.

This will be a challenge in life that I've to get through.
I have no idea what the future holds for me.
And i also have no idea what is the next step that I should take.
Maybe I shall think about after the exams.
No point thinking about it now, making me so depressed and feeling so stupid.

Oh well, just a random ranting post about my depressing life right now. Ciaoz then.

[ It isn't as easy as it seems. ]

2 down 3 to go

finished my maths paper..
haiz.. much better than CA..
at least i know how to do some problems..
but qns that i expected to come out didnt come out..
so sort of did not very well..
so wonder if i will pass or not.. hahax..

but oh well.. its over..
next is Digital Electronics, Data Structures and Algorithm and another dying paper Foundation Physic..
haiz.. hope i can quickly finish all these papers..
so stressed ahhhhh..
-.- oh well..

Maths paper

Maths paper ltr..
dunno how well i will fare..
hahax.. unless i understand maths..

yest dear called..
help me release some stress bah..
juz told him everything and cried like hell..
now feeling better..
strive on lo.. finish this exams first den see how..
my future is so bleak -.-
lucky got dear to fall on.. hahax..
if i cant get degree, oh well.. he shall yang wo yi bei zi..
lol..

anw.. juz wish me luck bah..
:)

drop out?

uni is killing me..
its either trying to kill me or drive me mad..
i did badly in CA paper..
oh well.. kinda expected it..
ha.. i din even noe how to do a single question..
wrote some crap and handed in.. better than nvr write anything..
100% will fail.. haha..
i dun wanna remodule it..
CA has dependency in my next sem module..
so i will have to forward my next sem module also..

i dunno wat to do..
i think i will drop out bah..
im left with 3 choices..

1. Drop Out
2. Continue
3. Die

ha.. nah.. first thing first..
i will appeal for bioengine..
if unsuccessful.. i will maybe drop out..
den go find some private uni..
doubt i can continue..
i feel soo super useless..
nvr known uni life is so tough..
maybe nvr worked hard enuf?
its like i dun understand even if i sit down and stare and attempt at it for 2 hours..
-.- continue on i will really break down some day..

told my mum..
my mum says go uni mean theres hope for u to get a degree..
no go means no hope.. but while u are at it, no point making urself so stress until u go mad right?
if really cannot take it as a lesson and find something you love to do..
lucky i have a understanding mum.. love her lots..

haiz.. i dunno anymore..
studying supposed to be a happy thing?
its not making me happy..
its causing me to be so depressed..
nvr known that i can study till halfway break down and cry..
haha.. so frustrated..
nvm continue cramming..
even if nothing goes into my brain at least i made an effort....

I hate exams

Havent blogged in a long while..

Blogging now juz to rant..
i super hate exams -.-
esp ntu exams.. argh! im dying..
save me from Circuit Analysis.. damn..
cant concentrate.. tmr my paper le..
haiz.....